I never get tired of hearing the beautiful message of salvation that Rick preached about this past week. What a beautiful message of Christ’s love for us. I have struggled, however, for many years regarding the exact date and time of my actual conversion. I was raised in a Christian home, but we attended a church of a different denomination. In my church, we all went through confirmation at a set age. I often felt that I already knew the Lord prior to this time, but there was not an opportunity to express this faith until the age of 13.
Once I did make this profession of faith, by way of confirmation, I feel that very little changed in my life. While I loved my church family, I do not feel that I received the in-depth Bible teaching and discipleship that I needed to strengthen my walk with the Lord. I went through my teenage years with the knowledge of God’s love, but not the strong faith that I knew the Lord desired of me. It wasn’t until my 20s when I was given the opportunity to grow more deeply in love with my Savior. I had suffered a miscarriage during my first pregnancy. Being a planner and researcher by nature, I found myself learning all that I could about pregnancy and miscarriage. When I became pregnant again, I was convinced that I would lose yet another child. I know that I must have been outwardly anxious because a dear friend, who also happened to be my teacher’s assistant and the wife of my previous minister, presented me with a Woman’s Devotional Bible. She had marked pages which she felt would help me with my anxiety. I remember her kind and convicting words reminding me to let God be in control.
Her simple, yet beautiful gift, helped bring me back to God’s precious word. After my first child was born, we were led to Cornerstone where the fabulous Bible teaching and studies brought me even closer to the Lord. Due to this closer walk with God, I found myself questioning my previous salvation experience. I sometimes found it difficult to hear all the women who could give the exact date, time and situation surrounding their conversion because my story was so much less interesting. After much prayer, I have accepted that God doesn’t work the same way in everyone’s life. What matters now is that I know, without a shadow a doubt, that I belong to Jesus and that I will spend all eternity with Him one day. I even treasure the conviction that I feel so often while reading God’s Word. Such conviction assures me that the Holy Spirit dwells within me and desires my obedience. I thank God for bringing me closer to Him and I thank Him for a friend who cared enough to help begin the process. I pray that God can use me to bring another person closer to Him, whether they are already saved or will be in the future. I know I wasted too many precious years being lukewarm in my faith. I pray that God will use me for the remainder of my life to grow his Kingdom and love his children.